The Simpson's Story
by Joe Hamm
Summary: The first episode in a series about the production of The Simpsons.


The Simpson's Story

DISCLAIMER: THE FOLLOWING CONTENT IS BASED ON FACT BUT SOME SCENES MAY NOT OF HAPPENED.

Clip of GEORGE H BUSH'S famous speech.

GEORGE H BUSH

And I promise to make American families a lot more like the Walton's and a lot less like the Simpson's.

The clip is cut up with a clip of BART SIMPSON

BART SIMPSON

Eat my shorts!

Fade to title: The Simpson's Story

The title fades away to a classroom containing MATT. MATT is drawing _life in hell_ rabbits. TEACHER walks down the classroom and sees that MATT is drawing.

TEACHER

Drawing rabbits again, Groening? (snatches the drawing off him and rips it up)

Bell rings.

TEACHER

Class dismissed! (Walks away)

MATT begins to pack up his bags.

TEACHER

(Turns around) And Groening meet me in detention tomorrow.

MATT

(Moaning) Aww man. Gimme a break.

TEACHER

You need to learn that you will never achieve anything by drawing rabbits.

Cuts to an older MATT driving down a highway really fast

MATT

(Singing) First you hear a mighty cheer, then you know that Groenings here. Then a streak of colour flashes on the ground…

MATT notices a _life in hell_ drawing on the passenger seat and smiles.

MUSIC: 'Driving in my car – Madness'

He continues driving down the highway.

Fades to screening room packed full of people. SAM and MENDEL are standing at the back of the room while the rest of the people are sitting in the chairs facing the screen. JIM and RICHARD enter the room.

JIM

Michael where the hell is Matt?

MENDEL

He is running a little late but he should be here soon.

JIM

Okay… yes… okay… Michael and Sam why don't you go take your seats… Richard see if Barry has arrived.

MICHAEL and SAM go and sit down and RICHARD moves towards the door.

MATT

(Entering and passing Richard) Oh hey Richard. Sorry I'm late Jim. Massive traffic jam…

JIM

No worries Matt. You are here now. We are still waiting for Mr Csupo to arrive. Why don't you go and find Brian? He should be sitting near the front.

MATT takes a seat. DILLER and RICHARD enter the room.

JIM

Barry! (Shakes hand) You made it. We are still waiting for our eccentric Hungarian friend.

GABOR and KENT enter.

JIM

Oh here he is now… and this is Kent Butterworth, the director of the episode.

DILLER

Pleased to meet you both. (Shakes hands with both one at a time)

GABOR

Hello Mr. Diller. I am Gabor Csupo!

JIM

Gabor he knows… just play the episode.

GABOR

Certainly Mr Brooks.

JIM

We better take a seat.

JIM, RICHARD, DILLER and KENT all take their seats at the front. GABOR runs off to play the episode. The episode begins. There is a stunned silence apart from JIM who laughs. Suddenly his laughter stops. The room slowly empties until it is only half full.

DILLER

What is this?

JIM

This is shit. (Pauses) Everyone get out…

People slowly file out in silence apart from JIM, RICHARD, DILLER, MATT, SAM, GABOR, BRIAN and KENT.

JIM

(Shouting) What the hell was that? That is the worst fucking thing I've ever seen! Are you trying to ruin me?

BRIAN

(Calmly) Perhaps we can fix it?

DILLER

We can't fix that! Lip syncing we can fix…

JIM

(Starts shouting and stands up) It is awful! God I'm ruined… I'm so sorry Matt… I've ruined your chance… that is the worst fucking animation I've ever seen!

GABOR

Perhaps it is the writing Mr Brooks…

JIM

(Angry) Fuck off!

GABOR

(Stands up and starts shouting) Please do not talk to me like that Mr Brooks!

JIM

(Angry) I'll talk to you however I fucking want to! I'm James L Brooks! And you my friend are just a replaceable worthless little shit!

GABOR

(Calmly) I have nothing more to say to you… I can assign someone to try and fix the animation but at the moment I am too incensed to discuss these matters with you… Bye! (Storms out)

JIM

(Angry) Good fucking riddance! (Puts his face in his hands, sits back down and speaks calmly) Kent you will no longer be working on the Simpsons. As for the rest of you we are going to have to wait until next week to see if the next episode is airable… otherwise we have a disaster on our hands… please leave now…

Everyone leaves the room apart from JIM and DILLER. The atmosphere is depressing and pessimistic. There is an awkward silence.

JIM

Barry… we need more time…

DILLER

I know James. I'll see what I can do…

Cuts to a cubicle in the men's bathroom. MATT is inside one of the cubicles walking up and down.

MATT

(Upset) Shit shit shit shit shit. Oh my god oh my god oh my god. Calm down Matt… Jim is a genius… he will make this work… oh my god…

SAM enters.

SAM

Matt, you in there?

MATT stays silent.

SAM

Listen Matt… if you are there… I know we haven't always seen eye to eye but I really hope this shit works out… for all of our sakes. (Leaves)

MUSIC: 'Three little birds-Bob Marley'

Cuts to MATT staring at the ceiling in his bed then cuts to SAM playing poker with a vacant stare off into the distance then cuts to JIM staring out of his bedroom window then cuts to SWARTZWELDER shooting cans off a fence outside his house in a valley. He walks towards his house. The song fades out. SWARTZWELDER enters and sees his BROTHER lying on the floor with a calculator.

BROTHER

John, George called. I said you weren't in. He said 'Okay I'll ring back…but by the way who is this?' I said 'shooting cans I think'.

SWARTZWELDER

(Picks up a cigar off the floor and rubs it clean and then lights it and puts it in his mouth) I'll ring him. (Walks over to the phone and picks it up) Meyer, right?

BROTHER

Didn't ask…

SWARTZWELDER

It was Meyer. (Dials the phone) Hey George. Someone called George rang me and I think it might have been you.

Screen splits to show MEYER on the other side of the phone.

MEYER

(Chuckles) Yeah it was. I'm just ringing to give you a quick update on the latest information regarding The Simpson's. The second episode is going to be screened for us all at the end weekend. Everyone is anxious to make sure we didn't just fuck up a home run.

SWARTZWELDER

We didn't fuck anything up. And anyway Jim'll fix it.

MEYER

Okay anyway I better be off but before I go who was that who answered the phone earlier?

SWARTZWELDER

Me. Remember I asked if you rang earlier… (Hangs up)

MEYER's have of the screen disappears.

BROTHER

Didn't even get the obscure English reference. (Shakes head) And he calls himself a writer…

Fades to the screening room. JIM, SAM, MATT, MEYER, VITTI, MARTIN, JEAN, REISS, KOGEN, WALLACE, MENDEL, RICHARD, BRIAN and DILLER are sitting in the front two rows nervously.

WALLACE

(Whisper to Kogen) I feel physical sick…

KOGEN

(Whispers to Wallace) Think how Jim, Matt and Sam feel… we are just the anonymous writers but they may never work again if this fails.

SILVERMAN and GABOR enter.

GABOR

Hello Mr Brooks.

JIM

Everyone is here. Play the episode.

GABOR runs off to play the episode and SILVERMAN sits down. The episode begins. Everyone stays silent.

Cuts to near the end of the episode.

Everyone is still silent. The episode ends and GABOR stands up and applauds. VITTI then stands up and applauds. REISS, JEAN, WALLACE and KOGEN join in the applause. MARTIN, MEYER, BRIAN, MENDEL, MATT and SAM stand up and begin to applaud.

JIM

(Stands up and shouts) Quiet! Is this airable Barry?

DILLER

A quick polish and this is more than airable! This is a top rated show!

JIM

(Begins to applaud) Thank you David. You have just saved The Simpsons!

RICHARD begins to applaud and everyone is stood there congratulating each other (especially congratulating SILVERMAN). MEYER slips out of the room. He runs down the corridor to a reception desk.

MEYER

Hey can I use the phone quickly before the impending rush?

RECEPTIONIST

Sure… what do I care? (Passes Meyer the phone the cable is stretching across the table) I've either just lost my job or (George picks up the phone) I've just become a small part of something huge…

MEYER

(Dialling) Well I'm pleased to confirm you've not just lost your job.

RECEPTIONIST

Can I use that phone after you?

MEYER

(Chuckles) Hello John. You missed the screening!

Screen splits to show SWARTZWELDER at the other end of the phone staring at a notice board with loads of wanted posters tacked to it.

SWARTZWELDER

Sorry 'bout that George. I had more important things to do. So how'd it go?

MEYER

The episode needs a bit of polishing but it is airable. Diller mentioned that we might be able to delay the season premiere until December and air the Christmas episode as the first episode.

SWARTZWELDER

K bye then. (Hangs up)

MEYER

(Chuckles) John Swartzwelder… someone should give that guy an award.

Fades out to outside the premiere party. It is snowing. GROENING is talking to SAM. SAM is smoking. People are walking into the building.

GROENING

Can't believe we are actually here.

SAM

I know, The Simpsons first season premiere party!

GROENING

(Pause) Hey Sam. I realise we aren't exactly the best of friends… but you helped me a lot during the week after that first episode.

SAM

Did I? How?

GROENING

With what you said to me in the toilets…

SAM

(Throws his cigarette at Matt in anger and shouts) You heard that! Why didn't you say? I thought you weren't there! Strap on a pair man! You could of at least acknowledged me! What the fuck is up with you Matt?

GROENING

Calm down man…

SAM

(Pushes Matt against the wall) Don't you dare tell me to calm down! Me and Jim have done so fucking much to make this shitty little cartoon a success so don't you dare tell me what to do!

MEYER and SWARTZWELDER walk out the building.

MEYER

Everyone it's about to air… (Notices Matt pinned to the wall by Sam) Woah! Calm down Sam! (Holds Sam back) Do you want this evening to be overshadowed by this kind of thing?

SAM

(Backing off) You're right George… he isn't worth it… (Walks away).

SWARTZWELDER

Romulas and Remus, Cain and Abel, Sam and Matt…

GROENING storms off into the building.

SWARTZWELDER

The line between genius and insane is very thin.

MEYER

As much as I love you and think you are the funniest guy in the world… you are also the craziest.

They both walk inside.

Cuts to everyone sitting down around a TV in the writer's room. The TV is on mute.

JIM

I'm proud to announce that The Simpsons season 1 premiere, Simpsons roasting on an open fire, is about to begin so it's time to take a break from all the festivities and alcohol and see what our misguided efforts have achieved.

Applause. JIM turns the TV off mute.

TV ANNOUNCER

Next up on Fox… The Simpsons!

The show begins.

JEAN

Change the channel!

Everyone laughs.

Cuts to the end of the episode. Everyone applauds.

JIM

Haha. Brilliant guys. Now go get completely hammered.

Everyone cheers and moves towards the door some are running excitedly.

Cuts to the sun rising. A bleary eyed JEAN walks into a production lounge full of alcohol bottles and cans lying on the floor. He is carrying a newspaper. Some of the staff are sleeping on the sofa's. One of these members of staff is REISS.

JEAN

(Walks over to REISS kneels down and shakes him) Mike wake up! You've gotta see this!

REISS

(Waking up) Warghh?

JEAN

(Points at the newspaper and reads) 'Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire', the premiere of Fox's new animated sitcom, was exceptional and groundbreaking. Who would want to return to Family Matters after this?

REISS

Pass that here. (Reads and then pauses) Oh my god… it was Fox's second highest rated show ever! Has Jim read this?

JEAN

I don't know. He left early last night…

Cuts to GROENING in his car driving down the highway.

GROENING

(Singing) Jingle bells jingle bells batman smells… (Notices a picture of The Simpsons family on the passenger seat)

MUSIC: 'Cars – Gary Numan'

He continues driving down the highway.

Fades to The Production Lounge.

GROENING walks in. JEAN runs over to him.

JEAN

Congratulations Matt. This is on the verge of explosion. This thing could get crazy. The receptionist says she has had so many calls asking for you and Jim.

GROENING

What is this mess?

JEAN

Yeah after you, Jim and Swartzwelder left it got even more mental here…

Reveal JIM and RICHARD standing at the door.

JIM

Clean this shit up… Diller will be arriving soon… We had a good episode last night but lets not go overboard and get complacent. Matt you have an interview with The Washington Post at 5:00pm.

MATT

Bu… I'm having dinner with Deborah at 5:00pm.

RICHARD

(With a lisp) Cancel it.

JIM

Where is Sam?

JEAN

No idea.

JIM

Richard, find him!

Cuts to SAM lying under a table at a bar. A playing card is stuck to his face and a bottle of beer has fallen over on the table and beer is dripping out of it onto his face. A barman walks over.

BARMAN

You okay man?

SAM

Waghh?

BARMAN

Who ever closed up must of missed you… sorry 'bout that. You okay?

SAM

Felt better…

BARMAN

I expect so. Come on man I'll help you up… (Holds out a hand to pull Sam up)

SAM

I can do it myself. (Stands up but hits his head on the table)

BARMAN

That's not gunna help your hangover…

SAM

I'm fine. (Stands up this time missing the table) See…

BARMAN

k. By the way you have an ace of diamonds stuck to your face.

SAM

(Peels card of his face) Erm… thanks. Hey can I use your phone?

BARMAN

Yeah sure…

SAM

(Walks over to the phone and dials) Hey. It's Sam Simon.

Screen splits to show GROENING at the other end.

GROENING

What do _you_ want?

SAM

Listen Matt I know you probably think I'm going to apologise for last night… but you're wrong… I'm not. I hate you. Now listen could you run off and find Richard or Jim. I'm going to be a little late…

GROENING hangs up and his side of the split screen disappears.

SAM

(Shouts in frustration) Aghh? For fucks sake!

BARMAN

What's up man?

SAM

I'm going to be very late for a meeting with Barry Diller.

BARMAN

Who?

SAM

Never mind. (Walks out)

BARMAN

Barry Dildo (chuckles to himself). I should be in comedy… if only I'd met the right person…

Cuts to JIM in his office on the phone.

JIM

(Shouting) What do you mean you can't find him? Well fucking find him! Diller will be here soon!

GROENING stands at the doorway

JIM

Sorry Richard I've gotta go. Matt is here. Talk to you later. (Hangs up)

GROENING

Hey Jim. I'm just wondering about this interview with The Washington Post…

JIM

Don't worry they are coming here…

GROENING

Yea I wasn't really expecting to be flying over to Washington for 5:00pm.

JIM

Then what is your problem?

GROENING

It is just… why am I doing the interview? My contribution to the show has been relatively minimal…

JIM

Lies! You're the most important person on the show! You created it! Without you we wouldn't be here.

GROENING

I s'pose you're right… it's just…

JIM

The Washington Post pay too much?

GROENING

They're paying me!

Cuts to reception desk.

RECEPTIONIST isn't there. MEYER is standing at the desk and an Australian PHONEMAN is fixing the phones.

MEYER

So you fixing the phones?

PHONEMAN

Yep.

MEYER

You gunna fix the phones in there (points to a door down the left of the corridor).

PHONEMAN

Nope.

MEYER

How about there? (Points to a door down the right of the corridor)

PHONEMAN

Yeah I think so.

MEYER

Oh. Do you know why the phone in there dials reception as soon as you click 0 so I don't have time to type in the full number?

PHONEMAN

I have no idea. I only do the cables mate…

Cuts to a street SAM is walking along it.

SAM

Bollocks! Where the fuck am I? (Notices an old woman) Excuse me miss where am I?

WOMAN

I don't care for your stench young man. (Walks off)

SAM

Hey? (Smells himself) Wait you are right… god I'm boned…

Cuts to JEAN, MEYER, REISS, VITTI and ROBERTS surrounding the PHONEMAN.

ROBERTS

So you fix phones?

PHONEMAN

Yes indeedy.

ROBERTS

Nice.

Cuts to JIM still on the phone.

JIM

Yeah Barry don't worry about it. Drop by any time you want. Everything is fine here. Yeah. Yeah sure. I'll see what I can do… Okay bye. (Hangs up and then dials another number) Hi Richard. Barry is going to be late but continue the search for Sam. I can't think where he's got to…

Cuts to SWARTZWELDER at his house using a bow and arrow to shoot at squirrels in a tree. His BROTHER exits the house.

BROTHER

(Shouting) Hey John! I thought you had to be at The Simpsons again today…

SWARTZWELDER runs off and jumps in his car and then drives off.

Cuts to the PHONEMAN still fixing the phone in the reception. He has developed an audience.

REISS

Do you do this often?

PHONEMAN

Yeah.

JIM walks out of his office.

JIM

What the fuck is going on?

PHONEMAN

I'm fixing the phones.

JIM

(Stares blankly from face to face) What the fuck? Get out everyone! Diller will be arriving soon… so make sure you are ready.

The crowd disperses.

JIM

What are you still doing here?

PHONEMAN

Phones.

JIM

There is nothing wrong with the phones… wait a minute… get out! (Chases the phoneman out of the front door) Did you really think you'd get away with this?

PHONEMAN

Sorry mate… I just really love that cartoon show you do here… (Begins to walk off)

JIM

(Smiles to himself) Wait come back!

PHONEMAN

(Turns around) Yeah.

JIM

Do you really fix phones?

PHONEMAN

Yeah.

JIM

Good it is just I have one problem… I dunno whether you can help… but when I dial 0 to try and get through to an 0800 number it goes straight through to reception. What gives?

PHONEMAN

Sorry mate I only do the cables… (Walks off)

Cuts to GROENING sitting in his office on the phone.

GROENING

Sorry Deborah I can't make it tonight. I've got an interview. Ring me back when you get this message. (Hangs up)

JEAN enters the room.

JEAN

Hey Matt. I heard you had an interview tonight. Need any help?

GROENING

No I should be fine… how hard can it be?

JEAN

Don't say that… it's a jinx…

Cuts to SAM walking down a street

SAM

I'm so boned… boned, fucked, stuffed, done for…

RICHARD taps him on the back

RICHARD

(Lisp) Hello Sam…

SAM

(Turns around) You found me? How?

RICHARD

(Lisp) We need to go before Barry arrives…

RICHARD and SAM walk off.

SAM

So how did you find me?

Cuts to SWARTZWELDER arriving at Gracie Films. He walks through to reception and meets MEYER wandering the corridors.

MEYER

John! You're here! Just in time as well. (Points to Diller walking down the corridor)

DILLER

Hey… John was it? Do you know where Jim is?

SWARTZWELDER

Probably in his office…

DILLER

Okay. He insisted I come on another tour of Gracie after the success last night. I'm also apparently having a meeting with Matt, Sam and himself. Ridiculous waste of time… I'm a busy man… as much as I love Jim I don't understand why I'm needed today…

SWARTZWELDER

So I'm not even needed? Damn I had a right little Robin Hood thing going at my house…

DILLER

Quite… (Walks off)

MEYER

(Chuckles) John, I love you…

SWARTZWELDER

Don't go all Neil Patrick Harris on me…

MEYER

That kid actor?

SWARTZWELDER

I'm just saying… he probably is… (Walks off)

MEYER

(Chuckles) How can this guy not influence your work?

Cuts to RICHARD's car pulling up at Gracie. SAM and RICHARD get out and walk through Gracie rapidly until they get to JIM's office where they knock.

JIM

(O.S.) Come in!

RICHARD opens the door to reveal a room containing JIM, MATT and DILLER all sitting at JIM's desk.

JIM

Ah there you are Sam. Barry was just saying that he is very pleased with the work of your writers.

SAM

Awesome.

DILLER

(Stands up) Anyway I better be going…

JIM

Don't you want to see where all the magic happens…

DILLER

Not in the slightest. (Walks out)

Cuts to SWARTZWELDER, MEYER, JEAN, REISS, VITTI and ROBERTS all sitting in the production lounge.

MEYER

So why did we 'have' to be here again?

JEAN

I never left…

Everyone laughs.

SWARTZWELDER

(Pulls a cigar out his pocket) I hear Matt has an interview later…

MEYER

Yeah.

ROBERTS

How can he be asked questions about the show? No offence to the guy because he is one of the nicest people I know but his contribution was limited.

REISS

Well if anyone ends up a millionaire just for being a nice guy I hope it is Matt…

Cuts to car pulling up at Gracie. REPORTER gets out and enters. REPORTER walks to reception and starts talking to RECEPTIONIST.

REPORTER

So these are the hallowed halls of The Simpsons?

RECEPTIONIST

Evidently. You must be the reporter…

REPORTER

Yes so where is the godfather of animation comedy?

RECEPTIONIST

There has only been one episode get a hold of yourself. He's through here… come with me… (Walks off down the corridor)

Outside GROENING's office.

RECEPTIONIST

He should be in here. Have fun.

REPORTER

(Enters) I will.

REPORTER enters GROENING's office.

REPORTER

Hello sir. (Bows)

GROENING

(Nervous laugh) So… this is my first interview so excuse me.

REPORTER

No problem… I'm just going to ask you about 5-10 questions and then I'll construct my article around that. So what do you think your main contribution to The Simpsons was?

GROENING

Well I created the characters. They are original Groening creations…

Cuts to the next day in a bar. SAM is there reading the newspaper with PARIS.

SAM

Daria! How could he say this?

PARIS

He is a jerk Sam.

SAM

'The Simpsons is very much a Groening creation. Every character you see was hand crafted by Matt. He is the Walt Disney of our generation.' Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. (Puts his head in his hands and begins to cry) I did it!

PARIS

Ah come on Sam. The press need a hero… and Matt is that to them. Its one stupid cartoon Sam. I know you're the genius, Jim knows you're the genius and the writers know you're the genius. So don't worry about it…

Cuts to ROBERTS, GROENING and MEYER in the production lounge. There is a stunned silence. The Washington Post is lying on the coffee table.

ROBERTS

(Hesitant and stuttering) Erm… what the hell Matt?

JIM, RICHARD, SAM, PARIS, JEAN, REISS, SWARTZWELDER, WALLACE, KOGEN and VITTI enter.

SAM, PARIS, KOGEN, WALLACE and VITTI all give GROENING dirty looks.

JIM

I just read the article Matt…

MATT

(Shaky) Mm…

JIM

Excellent work! This calls for a celebration!

SAM, PARIS, KOGEN, WALLACE, VITTI and ROBERTS exchange stunned glances.

SAM storms out. PARIS runs after him.

JIM

What's up with him?

Cuts to the corridor. SAM puts his back to the wall of the corridor and puts his face in his hands. He begins to cry and he slides down the wall into a slumped position.

SAM

(Crying) Jim's on his side!

PARIS

Then Jim's a fucking asshole! He's bought the presses view of Matt!

ROBERTS enter the corridor

ROBERTS

Hey Sam. Seriously don't let this crap get to you. Which makes the better story: 'Team of comedy writers work their ass off to create comedy gold' or 'Struggling cartoonist creates TV sensation'? Think about it man. Yeah it's fucked up! But you are still going to make some cash out of this plus you don't get the trials of fame.

SAM

I don't want fame… I want recognition…

JIM, RICHARD and GROENING enter the corridor.

JIM

What's up with Sam?

SAM

(Stands up) What's fucking up with me? What is fucking up with me? Can't you answer that Jim? How about you Matt? I bet even your precious snake Richard can't?

GROENING

Calm down man…

SAM

Don't tell me to calm down! (Hits Matt in the face)

JIM

Woah! Too far Sam. Richard get security! (Stands between MATT and JIM)

ROBERTS and PARIS hold SAM back.

JEAN, REISS, MEYER, SWARTZWELDER, KOGEN, WALLACE and VITTI all run through the door.

SWARTZWELDER

(Bellowing) What the fuck is going on in here? We were playing fucking scrabble?

Everyone stops and laughs apart from JIM and SAM.

SECURITY GUARD 1 arrives. He grabs SAM and begins to escort him out.

SECURITY GUARD 1

Let's go nutball!

SAM

For fucks sake! This is ridiculous! I hired most of the fucking writers! What happened to 'this is a writers show' Jim? What fucking happened to that?

WALLACE

(Whispers to Kogen) Does this mean he has been fired?

KOGEN

(Whispers back to Wallace) If he has I'm outta here…

Cuts to JIM and RICHARD in his office with ROBERTS, PARIS, WALLACE and KOGEN.

JIM

(Shouting) He fucking hit Matt?

ROBERTS

Yes but…

JIM

(Shouting) He's lucky Matt isn't pressing charges!

WALLACE

Yes but…

JIM

(Shouting) He is fucking mental!

KOGEN

Yes but…

JIM

(Shouting) He is a danger to others!

PARIS

(Angry) Shut the fuck up Jim! You know exactly why he did it! You aren't an idiot!

JIM

No-one tells James L Brooks to shut up…

PARIS

I'm sorry I wasn't aware that I was the shit on your shoe! You know full well that Sam is the genius behind The Simpsons! You sack Sam you fail!

JIM

(Angry) How dare you take this away from Matt?

WALLACE

Give me a break…

JIM

What?

WALLACE

If you get rid of Sam you risk a writer walk out… you sack Matt I'm not sure we'd give a crap… although I'd like to make it clear I love Matt I think he is great…

JIM

(Laughs) You wouldn't walk out.

KOGEN

I would.

ROBERTS

I would.

RICHARD

I would…

JIM

Richard? Fine… now get the fuck out of my office…

KOGEN, WALLACE, ROBERTS and PARIS leave.

Cuts to outside the office. KOGEN, WALLACE, ROBERTS and PARIS are all standing around in the corridor.

KOGEN

Smithers can think for himself… who'd of thought it?

Everyone laughs and walks off.

Cuts to a production lounge containing ROBERTS, GROENING, MEYER, JIM, RICHARD, JEAN, REISS, SWARTZWELDER, WALLACE, KOGEN, MENDEL and VITTI. Everyone is drinking coffee but very little chat is occurring.

SAM walks in. Everyone cheers but notably not GROENING or JIM.

SAM

I'm only here to pick up a bit of paper work… (Glances around to see disappointing faces) And then I'll be back if the Simpsons get a second season!

Everyone laughs and cheers but again notably not GROENING or JIM. SAM goes to walk out.

JEAN

Wait a minute… what about your paper work?

SAM

What paper work? (Winks and leaves)

ROBERTS runs after him.

ROBERTS

Why aren't you staying to do the boring stuff during the season run?

SAM

Jim wants me to take 'cool off' time. It's probably for the best… I haven't played poker in months!

ROBERTS

Haha cya man. Won't be the same without you…

SAM

You still have plenty of crazy left here.

Cuts to news broadcast on the TV.

NEWS ANCHOR

In entertainment news Fox's hit cartoon The Simpsons has become a pop cultural sensation with particular attention paid to the little hellion with an attitude problem, Bart. But is Bart a good role model to our youth? We find out after the break…

The TV turns off and the camera pans out to reveal GROENING holding the TV remote at his kitchen table eating cereal.

GROENING

Holy crap… this thing has gone nuts!

Cuts to the production lounge REISS, ROBERTS, MEYER and SWARTZWELDER are all there. REISS, ROBERTS and MEYER are throwing pens into a bin from a distance. SWARTZWELDER is sitting in the corner smoking a pipe.

JEAN walks in with a suitcase. He opens the suitcase to reveal The Simpsons merchandise.

REISS

Oh my god! A The Simpsons shower radio! (Picks it up)

MEYER

I raise your shower radio with a toilet brush! (Picks it up)

ROBERTS

(Picks something up) I have no idea what the fuck this is?

SWARTZWELDER

A bubistinger…

MEYER

A what?

SWARTZWELDER

Oh I thought we were playing a game…

JEAN

Hey guys… I swear Richard was sticking up for Sam?

ROBERTS

Yeah he was…

JEAN

Oh… it's just I overheard him having a conversation with Matt about how Sam was a 'toxic presence'.

ROBERTS

What the fuck?

MEYER

Richard is a tough character to read…

Cuts to GROENING walking down the road wearing a The Simpsons Crew jacket. A small CHILD with his MUM walks past and point at GROENING.

CHILD

(Points at Matt's jacket) Bart!

MUM

Don't point young man… I'm so sorry (turns around to apologise to Matt) Oh my god you work on the Simpsons! Me and my husband love that show… wait a minute… you're Matt Groening! Can you sign my… my… erm… (Frisks body searching for something and then looks around searching for something her eyes rest on her son) my child!

GROENING

(Laughs and signs her child) I'm glad you like the show…

Cuts to JIM and JEAN talking in JIM's office.

JIM

They are in danger of killing the show with this continuous repetition of episodes.

JEAN

As long as the merchandising is selling people are obviously still interested…

JIM

I suppose but I don't want this gem of a show ruined by poor scheduling… the second season is well into production now and I want to air it all!

Cuts to DILLER and JIM in JIM's office.

JIM

You want to do what?

DILLER

We want to use The Simpsons to compete with the Cosby Show.

JIM

You're going to damage the show. We are in the middle of 'Bart mania'… What more do you want?

DILLER

For Bart to beat the Cos…

Cuts to black screen… 'To be continued…' appears on the screen.

END OF EPISODE 1

http:/ generationyellow. proboards. com


End file.
